Bishop Hill Taxation as poetry
Oct 28, 2009 Tax This is shamelessly stolen from Jeff Id. The idiom is American, but the point is universal.
At first I thought this was funny…..
then I realized the awful truth of it.
Be sure to read all the way to the end!…
A Tax Poem
Tax his land,
Tax his bed,
Tax the table
At which he’s fed.
Tax his tractor,
Tax his mule,
Teach him taxes
Are the rule.
Tax his work,
Tax his pay,
He works for peanuts
Anyway!
Tax his cow,
Tax his goat,
Tax his pants,
Tax his coat.
Tax his ties,
Tax his shirt,
Tax his work,
Tax his dirt.
Tax his tobacco,
Tax his drink,
Tax him if he
Tries to think.
Tax his cigars,
Tax his beers.
If he cries
Tax his tears.
Tax his car,
Tax his gas,
Find other ways
To tax his ass.
Tax all he has
Then let him know
That you won’t be done
Till he has no dough.
When he screams and hollers,
Then tax him some more,
Tax him till
He’s good and sore.
Then tax his coffin,
Tax his grave,
Tax the sod in
Which he’s laid.
Put these words
upon his tomb,
“Taxes drove me to my doom…”
When he’s gone,
Do not relax,
Its time to apply
The inheritance tax.
...
Accounts Receivable Tax
Building Permit Tax
CDL license Tax
Cigarette Tax
Corporate Income Tax
Dog License Tax
Excise Taxes
Federal Income Tax
Federal Unemployment Tax (FUTA)
Fishing License Tax
Food License Tax
Fuel Permit Tax
Gasoline Tax (42 cents per gallon or more)
Gross Receipts Tax
Hunting License Tax
Inheritance Tax
Inventory Tax
IRS Interest Charges IRS Penalties (tax on top of tax)
Liquor Tax=0
Luxury Taxes
Marriage License Tax
Medicare Tax
Personal Property Tax
Property Tax
Real Estate Tax
Service Charge Tax
Social Security Tax
Road Usage Tax
Sales Tax
Recreational Vehicle Tax
School Tax
State Income Tax
State Unemployment Tax (SUTA)
Telephone Federal Excise Tax
Telephone Federal Universal Service Fee Tax
Telephone Federal, State and Local Surcharge Taxes
Telephone Minimum Usage Surcharge Tax
Telephone Recurring and Non-recurring Charges Tax
Telephone State and Local Tax
Telephone Usage Charge Tax
Utility Taxes
Vehicle License Registration Tax
Vehicle Sales Tax
Watercraft Registration Tax
Well Permit Tax
Workers Compensation Tax
California Redemption Tax
Recycling Tax
STILL THINK THIS IS FUNNY?
Not one of these taxes existed 100 years ago, and our nation
was the most prosperous in the world.
We had absolutely no national debt, had the largest middle
class in the world, and Mom stayed home to raise the kids.
Reader Comments (10)
Hot diggety-dog
Simultaneously hilarious and infuriating!
But apart from the sanitation, the medicine, education, wine, public order, irrigation, roads, the fresh-water system, and public health, what have the Romans (sorry, taxes) ever done for us?
This nation has been taxed over 40% of her fruit of labor, yet the government is still $13 trillion (with a "t", or in scientific notation, 10^12) in the hole, which will eventually be filled by you and your next generations. Americans, what has to happen to make you realize your government is screwing you over and over again?
the author forgot the most heinous of taxes, inflation.
SO.. the stock market is up on the numbers? unless you adjust for inflation, when it's 54% down in comparative buying power!
I surprised you forgot about this:
Let me tell you how it will be
There's one for you, nineteen for me
Should five percent appear too small
Be thankful I don't take it all
(If you drive a car) I'll tax the street
(If you try to sit) I'll tax your seat
(If you get too cold) I'll tax the heat
(If you take a walk) I'll tax your feet
Don't forget to tax the tax.
I thought this to be very thought-provoking, but I'm unsure what the part about women staying home to raise the kids has to do with any of the economic items. There are many women who would choose work outside the home, even if the economy was as it was 100 years ago. And many women 100 years ago wish they had the opportunity to work outside the home, but were discriminated against for any career that was typically done by a man.
Goodness, there might even have been a few men back then who would have loved to be stay-at-home dads and let their wives be the main breadwinners, but never had that option because the norms of society would not let them.
So I'm not sure why that reference needs to be there. Are you implying that women staying home to raise kids is the ideal situation, like a large middle class, and no debt is an ideal economic situation?
Joan
I didn't write it so I can't really comment. I think the point was more that the option was much more viable then.
foobert in Australia we impose an excise on petrol then the resulting price is taxed at ten percent for our goods and services tax. So there you go a tax on a tax.